If you’ve ever been asked to queue or was refused entry to a club , you might have wondered how the skinny guy in an XXL teared-up tank shirt managed to get in ! Now, maybe he had more muscles, maybe he was better-looking, maybe he’s lady Gaga etc. What’s certain however is that it’s not his first time, he’s been here before i.e. He knows the bouncer. Him getting in is the result of a long process that probably started where you are standing.
The gist is that if you want to get in as well and 'keep getting' in like a breeze, it won’t help to argue with the muscle mountain blocking the door. You need to 1) leave, 2) become an entirely different person and then 3) come back. Please :) The following is not a guide to how get into clubs. Bouncers are metaphors for Life's obstacles and clubs a metaphor for what you're after in life. Let's take the following three obstacles / flaws you might be trying to overcome / fix:
Now the ideal situation you're after is the following:
The common mistake is to think the solution lies there and then. "Oh ! I'm putting mental labels on people. I should stop" - "I'm really inconsiderate towards my planet, how can I be such a (insert insult of choice)" - "Super-scared of speaking in front of this audience. Omg, I should relax". Truth is you should 1) leave, 2) become an entirely different person and then 3) come back :) One powerful hack is deliberate attention:
The power of getting a hold of your thoughts (mindfulness) can be of help when trying to get past the bouncer. Of course, it takes time. Just like it took the guy in the XXL T-shirt to get to know muscle man :)